later that evening

Its 00.10 and I'm being forced to watch `project runway`, a total load of crap that my ex missus, now referred to, in my own mind and without my volition as `that fuckin Piece of shit bitch` *, insists helps her personal growth, even the super models dont make this vapid. Lame ass shit worth space in my existence, reality IN MY LIFE!! my soul screams for release from the torture, if it wasn't for the relatively small dig of smack I've just had then I would be forced to shove my arm up through my arse and evict manually the ulcer in my gut that is surely forming from all the pent up, wanked out stress fucked bollox that I'm dealing with right now. Fuck it, gonna have a spliff now, try to dream the misery of this moment in my existence, into the perfect bliss that I only find in sex fighting and smack. There's one more perfect bliss I have known but that's for later. *we have known each other 26 years, been together on and off for 16 years and for the last nine, including the birth of our child I thought we would be together for ever, there you go, I've mentioned my true bliss, but also the bitch tainted this with her lies and cold hearted deception, really she poisons and I still feel for her, cos she doesn't see it, and when she does finally admit the truth to herself, its gonna destroy her as its destroyed others.